anxiety, Depressed, Education, England, Feeling sorry, Mistake, Moving, Planning, Uncategorized

My future

I question my life choices every day and wonder is it enough for me to be strong-willed and stubborn.

Money plays a large fact in everyday life and with me not being apart of the top 1%, I like everyone else has to work for a living.

Hmm, I am valued by how many hours I put in and how hard I slave away. Being a number in the system doesn’t sound fun to me.

Does anyone truly have a plan for the future? I’m spending thousands of dollar (or pounds) on a chance.

The possibility of a chance to be a writer or a PR agent. What a gamble.

*** Never drink people, this was in my drafts.

Advertisements
anxiety, Depressed, Education, Feeling sorry, Loneliness, Student

Anxiety Attack

I had a massive anxiety attack during an interview.

So if you don’t know, I’m in college studying journalism. Yay! However, it’s crazy hard and I’ve been struggling to keep up.

The professor says that I’m taking it to serious and that I’m not doing awful.

Apparently, my mind and body are not in agreement with him.

But I was out following a story and just walked into this man’s shop. Sweet man and he had no problem letting me interview him.

I have been told that I talk to much and need to let the person speak. Well I spoke during the interview and that completely screwed me.

I got a hot flash and my ears started to ring, I got lightheaded and could hear my heartbeat in my ear.

The stress, thought and fear of failure is trying to kill me.

I stood there and let this mental attack go on because I needed this shot. This interview was so needed that I would have given up without it.

University is so stressful and I didn’t realize how much my body was suffering.

It was definitely a kick in the ass.

Buckingham, Depressed, Travel, Uncategorized

Top five places I have to visit.

Okay, so this will more than likely change in the next 15 minutes but it’s worth a shot.

1: Cuba

I love the idea of going back in time but since that’s impossible I’ll settle for a country frozen in time. I want to see old cars and stand on the street that separates the rich from the poor. I want to eat outside and just take it all in.

 

2: Greece

Greece, Mykonos & Santorini, October 2018

This picture speaks for itself. I love water and countries surrounded by water make me so happy because I love the beach.

 

3: Morocco

Morocco, floatation, currency

I want a red house but a blue one will do as long as it close to the beach. I want to learn how to fish but I know that I don’t have that patience. Morocco is supposed to be cheap but at the same time have great quality in their products. So I want to shop and see a beach but at the meet new people.

 

4: South Korea

South Korea is a great place for an autumn holiday. There are plenty of spots to enjoy the fiery reds and oranges of fall, and have a taste of the country’s rich culture and tradition. This itinerary takes you in and around Seoul, then guides you to venture out into the countryside where you’ll see South Korea’s best spots for autumn.

They are known for their beauty, which is beyond me. I don’t know the first thing about makeup and wish I did but I have never been able to get the hang of it. Other than that, I want to sit outside and eat at one of those places that allows you to cook the meal.

 

5: Brazil

Honestly, this is because I want to see the difference between here and Cuba.

I want to go to a lot more countries but these are my top five, for now.

 

Depressed, Education, Feeling sorry, Planning, Student, Travel

Planning vacations.

I have a 5 week vacation coming up mid- December but I’m stupid broke.

Like broke people see me and they look away trying not to show pity.

However, I have to be irresponsible and go somewhere, so when looking for inspiration I do what most people do and hit the internet.

There are so many places to visit and I cant imagine just picking one place, so I have to plan and plan and plan till I have it down to a tee.

My favorite source of planning and picking a place is Facebook. A page called Places You’ll See has shown me more places than I would have ever thought of.

Watching travel videos and going through pictures makes everything so surreal.

Depressed, Education, Loneliness, Moving, Student, Travel

Traveler’s struggles

Okay, so I’ve been on this traveling journey for close to a year now.

I find that getting the time to travel and completing your at home responsibilities to be my biggest challenge.

This year, I’ve gone to Spain, France, the Netherlands and have now settled in England. The problem with that is that I now have to pay England living prices.

But not just that England university living prices.

For those that don’t know, England is expensive, not Singapore or Hong Kong expensive but up there. For every dollar I spend I cry a little inside.

Not being able to travel at a wim is frustrating and saddening but mostly it makes me feel trapped.

Money is the root to all evil but it supplies you with much needed travel time.

Buckingham, Depressed, Education, England, Feeling sorry, Loneliness, Moving, Student, Uncategorized

Job

I finally got a job. After 6 weeks of being jobless and feeling depressed, I start tomorrow.

After working in a call center for 3 years and vowing to never work there again, I applied for call centers again and one said yes.

The only thing that could hinder this is me and my need to prioritize school over money. I know that I need money to go to school but I need school to stay.

Confusing, I know. The catch 22 is in full swing here but I’m excited and cant wait to make money so that I can eat properly and travel.

I need a weekend in Ireland making that will be my fifth country of the year and completing my New Year’s resolution.

Little bit of a view of what I found today. This place isn’t so boring as I originally thought, who knew.

Everyone, just not me.